Thursday, January 7, 2010

The Decisions that Mothers Must Make

I must have this.

Tonight!

How fortuitous that I have all the ingredients.

...

I know, I know, two posts in a day! What has happened?!

Well, what has happened is that I've cooped myself up in my house for way too long and am dying for some conversation. Since there is no conversation readily available (do I sound lame or what?) I figured I'll send my musings out to the internet world.

Okay, so it is 4:50 and just 15 minutes ago I put Jack down for a nap. Gah!

What was I thinking?!

I was thinking that if it is 4:00 (my internal debate started at 4:00, I didn't make a decision until 4:30) and Jack is rubbing his eyes and lying prostrate on the couch, the next four hours are going to be rough. I've been very emotional the last few days, and if I let him stay up, I don't have a store of grace or patience or joy big enough for us to both make it until bedtime unscathed.

I was also thinking that he went to bed very late last night and woke up very early this morning, with only a regular nap to nowhere-near-compensate for the four hours he missed of his regular snooze routine.

Finally, I was thinking that if he took a tiny sleep I could squeeze in a catnap too. Then I changed my mind and thought that if he slept for a half hour I could pick up my house a little bit and do some of the dinner prep so that the final hours of the day fly by without incident.

So, my sweet boy is quiet in his crib, and instead of resting or cleaning, I am drooling over caramel pudding.

So now, to put away my typing, fly through my tidy up and ignore dinner prep in favor of making putting (what the heck?! I just read this - four weeks after posting it - and I wrote "putting" when I meant "pudding" why didn't anyone say anything?!) and letting it set before I get Jack up...

Ready, set... and she's off!

What I Daydream About

Ever wonder what I daydream about?

Probably not.

But in case you do, let me tell you.

Better yet, let me show you:

A stomach like this

And a bottom like this

And moving like this

I went over to my sweet mum's house yesterday and she had the Athleta catalogue on her table. I picked it up and was immediately in love. And in envy of every bum photographed.

I feel like a five year old, thumbing through the pages over and over, composing a mental shopping list.

I find it weird that I've sort of glazed over the fact that in two months or so I will be in labor with our second child. And after that, I will be nursing and not sleeping much and chasing a two-year old.

Somehow I've skipped ahead to six weeks after Joey's arrival to that magical time when my doctor will give me a thumbs up and release me back to the gym.

How is it that I'm so tired now, so worn-out feeling and so, let's be honest, pathetic, but what sounds the greatest to me is a really sweaty work out? I wish I could bottle the craving for when the time comes and use it to motivate me to actually get back in shape.

Since I know that my memory is pitiful as a pregnant woman and as a new mama, you'll have to remind me of this blog post. I'm thinking about cutting out pictures from that catalogue to keep me ambitious. But then again, it could just make me depressed.

I'll have to see. Maybe I'll just tuck the whole catalogue into my dresser to be pulled out at an appropriate time.

Whatever I do when the time actually comes, you can be before that I will have ogled the catalogue at least once a day for the next week or so. Ahhh... sports bras, yoga pants, tennis shoes... I'll see you soon!