Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Just the Basics

"It could be a disaster, it could be a golden-year, but most likely it will be a little bit of both and something in-between."

That is what I told my grandma when I let her know that Andy and are moving to Arizona.

In two weeks.

That's right folks.

Andy and I have officially given into a dream and are following the yellow brick road.

Whether the path leads us to the Emerald City or to the lair of the evil flying monkeys has yet to be determined.

Let's back up a mite, shall we?

Several months ago Andy used his joking voice to let me know of a job opening in his company's Tucson shop. For the same position he holds here, just in a sunnier state.

Several days ago, after living in total chaos for a week, I used my joking voice to say, "Hey, how about that job in Arizona?!"

Then, all of a sudden, without even meaning to, we were both using our serious voices to discuss what it could and would mean and if we would really be interested in a major shift of lifestyle.

Turns out we both WERE interested. So Andy talked to his boss and wouldn't you know it, the job was still open, but just, and so Andy signed his name on a few sheets of paper and ta da! We are packing our things and driving to Arizona in about 13 days.

The first week after the decision was made was pretty thrilling.

The last two days, as goodbyes have started, have been pretty heart-wrenching.

In a little while, when I'm not feeling so emotionally taxed, I will explain more about what we hope to accomplish with the move and some of the most motivating factors - but today, I think I can only manage the basics.

There is still a sense that this isn't really happening and I have a small hope, married to a small fear, that seeing it written, in my own words, on my own blog, will settle some of the flutter in my brain and heart.

Let it be known, that I am VERY excited about the possibilities before me and my family.

And let it also be known, that I am mourning the life we have loved in Washington and the fact that it will stay and we are going.

It occurred to me that this is the very first time I have had to deal with significant loss. It feels very strange to know that my own choices are causing such sadness, and that behind and next to and in front of and all around that sadness are other emotions: expectation, hope, fear, enthusiasm, love and joy and peace.

I feel compelled to DO something with all of these emotions. I feel a need to reign them in and tame them. But I'm not sure that is really the point. They are part of this adventure, and part of this life and I think I don't want to miss this part.

I'm in-between again.

So, prepare for a peppering of thoughts on moving, both poetic and practical. You will probably hear more about Washington vs. Arizona for a while than CrossFit (gasp!), so just be ready.

And, by the way, the first thing we did after putting the move on the table as a legitimate possibility was to look up the available CrossFit gyms in the area. There are four. We will be in CrossFit heaven.

True Story.

6 comments:

hootenannie said...

What??!?!? I am SHOCKED! But in a "this is the most exciting thing ever" kind of way.

Where in AZ?

Such a change!

So far from family!

So many EMOTIONS.

I'm sure things are super chaotic, and you'll tend to the business of *moving* for awhile. But when it calms down, more details, please. :)

Love to you and all your boys.

Josh and Rosemary said...

Way to embrace all of the process my friend. I know God will speak to you in each emotion and thought and experience during this grand adventure.

Aimeelu said...

wow! What adventures! Will pray for your trip, your good byes and your new adventures.

Alissa Maxwell said...

Congratulations on jumping in with two feet! Having left Seattle and everything we loved to to move into the unknown, can I give you one piece of advice?
Give yourselves a minimum time commitment. Ours was 2 years. That way, we avoided the urge to constantly compare "Seattle vs Bend" and instead focused on doing our best to build community in those two years. You know what? After 6 months, we were lonely but we stuck it out. After 2 years, we decided to build a family here. After 5 years, we hope to never leave.

Good Luck!

Emily said...

Alissa, thanks for your thoughts! I promised Andy I would give it a year of treating it like home and a really solid effort of not thinking the desert is hideous and brown, brown, brown.

I also warned him that I might need to paint a forest of trees on our wall :-)

Sarah said...

Emily, you should see the sunsets and sunrises down there! They are amazing. And, they have woods if you go southeast of you, up in the mountains. You can hike or camp. And go to Bisbee. You'd probably like that but your boys will like the shoot-outs at Tombstone. I liked that part of the country, myself.