Five-year Plan

I want these.

Jack's latest antics:

• At this very moment he is rolling and chasing a foam soccer ball all over the dining room floor and sort of singing to himself.  I love watching him play!

• Yesterday while I was feeding him lunch (little pieces of leftover dinner, because he's so grown up and can feed himself) he picked up a piece of chicken and held out his hand to me.  It took me a second to connect the movement to the intent, but he was offering me his food!  Awww!  Thanks baby!  So now I am in that "pretend eating" phase.  That's right, I'll be the mom making exaggerated chewing faces and swallowing noises for the next few months. 
  

• When I'm bustling about the house, especially when I'm making dinner, I still have a little shadow.  It is so, so endearing!  It makes it a little hard to move though, because if I stand still for too long Jack climbs right up my legs and stands that way, gripping my pants.  His balance is precarious enough that if I move too quickly, down he goes.  So I stand motionless or do a VERY slow motion shuffle across the kitchen floor.  But mostly I just laugh and then carry him back into the living room so that I have about three minutes to stir, taste, plate, before he is back, clinging to my leg.  
  

Perhaps it is an indicator that Jack will be more proficient in the kitchen than his father.  

For the sake of my future daughter-in-law, I sure hope so.

Although, GUYS, Andy made me dinner last week! It is true!  And, I think with a some slightly modified grocery purchases, he is willing to make dinner once a week.  I cannot even tell you what a giant leap this is for all of Aicheledom!  

I used to joke that I had a five-year plan to get Andy in the kitchen.  (His joke has always been that he married me for the food - It's only a joke people!)

The first phase of my plan was to send Andy on little grocery runs, all by himself.  For nothing too crazy, but things not found in the Hamburger Helper isle.  Maybe some garlic.  Maybe some olive oil.  Maybe some pimento peppers.  

An example of items on the list I give him looks like this:  Fresh basil - it is in the produce section, in the refrigerator case, on the top left hand side, in a little plastic box type thing, it should be 2.99.  Avocado - not rock hard, not too squishy, it should just give a little when you squeeze it.  

One time he OFFERED to get my whole list (double digit items people!).  I re-wrote the list in order of how he would find it in the store, isle by isle.

You may think I'm over the top, but the point is for him to feel like HE CAN DO IT!  Make it easy.  Make it not a chore.  

This was the first step.

Truthfully, I didn't know what would come after that.  But I thought, hey, five years is a good amount of time, I'll come up with something.

The next step ended up being Eggs Benedict.  Almost every Sunday morning we sleep in, get up and make coffee and toddle around for an hour or so, and then I make Eggs Benedict.  It is not a good thing to eat if you are watching your calories, or worried about cholesterol, but if you want to make your taste buds happy, give it a try.   

Anyhow, Andy KNOWS how happy it makes me to cook with people, especially him, so one morning he volunteered to help.  SERIOUSLY!?  YES YOU CAN HELP!  Be still my beating heart!

His big thing is he says he's not creative, he needs rules, instructions.  Well, the part of our brunch that has instructions is the sauce.  It is just a packet of sauce mix to which you add milk and butter and stir.  

So now, Andy squishes in the kitchen with me to man the sauce.  I love it.  I am grinning ear to ear just thinking about it.  

So I guess sauce mix was stage two.  

Thanks to Trader Joe's, we now are in stage three (I have no idea how many stages it will take to be cooking buddies, but I am now VERY optimistic that it will happen in my lifetime).  TJ's has very yummy frozen food.  In particular, I am thankful for the Orange Chicken and the microwave rice.  Andy has made this twice now, very successfully (I did sneak into the kitchen and add some broccoli, but veggies are a few steps away I think, so I'm okay with that).

I wish you could know the multitude of emotions that swell in my heart as he brings me a plate of food that I didn't have to lift a finger to prepare.  Gratitude, adoration, pride, victory, burning desire (after all, it has to be worth his while, no?).

Ah. Happy sigh.

The fine and tender nuances of married life.  

Andy, thanks for being willing to try something that you think you'll (and probably do) hate, just to make me happy. I appreciate you, and your efforts, very, VERY much.

Muah!

For those of you not in the know, 

that is a kiss noise.  

Like a highfalutin pair of ladies 

holding each other on the shoulders, 

with pinkies up 

and leaving an air kiss on each cheek. 

 "Muah, muah.  How aaaree you daaahhling?"

In our case it simply means,

"If you were here right now I would kiss you!"

Feel free to borrow it for all of your lovey-dovey needs.

Accomplishment

For the record (and for Jack's grandmas who read this blog) this week has been a momentous one for Jack.

Not only has his slither-scoot-army crawl blossomed into a full fledged, if not somewhat awkward, hands-and-knees crawl, but he has a TOOTH!

I was picking him up from the Y's Childwatch and the sweet lady who was caring for him said, "And I see that he's getting a little tooth."  I played it cool, "Oh yeah!  He's growing so much!" But in my head I was thinking, "A Tooth!!!  How did you see it before me?!"  I've been faked out so many times by Jack's "teeth" that I almost didn't believe her.  But sure enough, when I stick my finger in his mouth, I feel a tooth! Wow, this is a big week for the Aichele baby!

I wish my accomplishments racked up as quickly!  My mind is pretty ambitious about what I want to do "some day" but it seems like it is going to be an awfully long wait for that day to arrive.  

For example, I would really love to be a life coach, which will require some more schooling (read, heavy investment of time and money) but as of right now, it is ambiguous if/when that will ever happen.  I love the idea of being a momprenuer (a new buzzword of the business world by the way) but am thwarted again by all the hurdles, perceived and actual, that impede that goal.  

I would like to participate in a triathlon, have rockin' hair, go on What Not To Wear...

Okay, total side note... 

Tomorrow is the day I am going to meet Clinton!

What am I going to wear?!  

How am I going to get past the guards that will try

and keep me from entering 

because I don't fit in the 14W-24W sizes?  

Will therebe guards?  

I hope so, that would be so exciting... 

Anyhow, wouldn't  you know it, just the day before 

the big rendezvous, my skin is misbehaving!  

Bad skin!  

Months and months of a radiant, blemish-free complexion

 and suddenly I'm spotted!

Oh well, life goes on.  

I'll console myself with dreams of 

what would happen if I were to win 

the drawing for a $500 shopping spree... 

*daydreamy smile*

And now back to the real stuff...

 

... invest in marriages, have the house that all the kids want to hang out at, travel the world, invest in my community, learn web design, plant a garden, live mindfully, challenge people to live more joyful lives, sell a painting... my list is long...

Many of these things feel like they will be on hold for a while.  Some of them I've made excuses that keep me from starting.  I wonder why I do that. Whatever the reason, I don't like that I do it. The paralyzed life is one that I do NOT want to live. 

So this week I have been making strides toward accomplishing items on my list.  I spent yesterday morning at MOPS, taking the first steps to meet other moms.  I made a trip to the craft store and bought supplies to make Christmas presents.  I've cleaned my house each night before I go to bed so I can wake up with a fresh start, I even went to Zumba at the gym to practiced groovin'.

I am satisfied with what I've done.  

My greatest accomplishment today?  Getting a seven month old and a four month old to take naps simultaneously (without one peep!) and during that time, taking a shower, doing the dishes and posting a blog.  It may not be the finish line at a triathlon, but it is surely something worth celebrating!

  

John 10:10

"The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full."

I have confession.  In the last weeks I have fallen victim to the thief.  What has he stolen?  Joy, confidence, acceptance, energy, peace.  What has been left in the wake? Fear, guilt, anxiety, sadness, confusion.  

I was weak and I let the thief walk away with my dreams and hopes.  I barely put up a fight.  I don't think I knew what was happening until they were gone.  

The thief is a master of disguise.  In a season of life where mothers are expected to be tired, overwhelmed, distanced from spouses, and even depressed, I accepted the changes and didn't question.  I assumed they would just go away.  

But here I am.  Seven months into motherhood and discouraged.  I battle daily to find simple pleasures, to approach another load of dishes or laundry, or sometimes even Jack, without grumbling, to LIVE THIS SEASON TO THE FULL.  My thoughts turn sour at the slightest bump.  Instead of my usual optimism and confidence in God's love and provision and my ability to hear him, I assume the worst.  I assume that I am alone, unwanted and doing everything wrong.

It hurts.  It feels crushing.  I almost want to give in.

BUT I WON'T.

Jesus said he came that "they might have life, and have it to the full."  That EMILY might have life to the full.  

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free.  Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." Galatians 5:1

"Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom." 2 Corinthians 3:17

"But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control."  Galatians 5:22,23

"... I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." John 10:10

I was reading in Genesis last week and came to the chapter where Abram and Lot are about to part ways.  God says to Abram, "Lift up your eyes from where you are and look north and south, east and west.  All the land that you see I will give to you... Go, walk through the length and breadth of the land, for I am giving it to you." Genesis 13:14,17

I distinctly heard God call me to look up from where I am.  In the middle of the day, I see a dirty house, a needy baby, dinner to make, not enough time to enjoy the company of my husband... those things discourage me.  My feeble view of the future looks like more of the same for awhile, instead of the life of adventure and purpose that I crave.  

But God sees all of the north, south, east and west.  He sees it ALL.  He knows where I am now and he knows what he plans to give me.  It is going to be more than I could ever even think to ask for.  

So his challenge to me?  To Go. To walk the length and breadth of the land.  To love him each day and to flourish in the midst of diapers, in the midst of loneliness and in spite of the foggy future.  Just GO.  Live it up.  Thrive.  Set down roots of faith in him and obedience.  Keep my hands open to receive daily doses of the joy and peace that I need.  Live with gratitude and endurance.

This season, this battle, this daily fight to accept the gift of full life, is necessary to shape me for the things God has in store.  Truthfully, that knowledge doesn't really make it feel any easier, but I have to learn that my feelings aren't always going to reflect the truth of who God is and how he's working in my life.  They can be a tool, but I've been relying on them too heavily.

So now, on to the art of living.  God, please seal this truth in me.  

Courage to you friends as you look north, south, east and west and as you go claim the land God has promised you.  

Something Big

I confess a dream that some day I will do something big.  It isn't pride, a notion that I am great and will do great things, it is more of a sense of calling, a dissatisfaction with mundane.  

But today is Monday and that means I do a lot of little things.  I play with Dane, I play with Jack.  I feed Dane, I feed Jack.  I play peek-a-boo and I get peed on.  We make a big mess and  I clean it up... Mondays are filled with ordinary.

In the midst of all these commonplace activities, I still feel that draw to BIG.  It seems like each of the ordinary undertakings of my life are preparing me for whatever that big thing might be.

I want to be a woman who influences, who inspires, who challenges and who calls out the amazing in other people.  

But I want the best of both worlds.  I want to cherish the little moments that are shaping me while I wait expectantly for the big events.  I want to relish the sweet smiles of my baby and the conversations with friends. Each of my every day tasks are giving me a chance to grow, to learn and to store up credibility.  

Lord, give me the strength and wisdom to do the ordinary tasks well and to dream your dreams.